Haruko and the Bees
by Bassically-Syko
Summary: Yes, it is as strange as the title is, but so is the show...


Nao: My Dad told me that my name means "honesty", so I'm gonna be honest with you, Haruko. You scare me. I mean, what normal person has pink hair? I know you say that you're an "alien", but you look more like someone who was ripped off the streets of New York and then randomly placed into an extremely insane Japanese cartoon.  
  
Haruko: I'll take that as a compliment...I died my hair myself. With Kool-Aid.  
  
Nao: That explains the swarm of bees hovering over your head.  
  
Haruko: Bees? *looks up* I don't see any, just some thunderclouds.  
  
Nao: Those aren't thunderclouds...*slowly backs away from Haruko*  
  
Takkun: Na Na?!?  
  
Haruko: Oh.  
  
Nao and Haruko: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!  
  
Takkun: NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
All: *run away from the bees*  
  
Nao: They're gaining on us!!!!  
  
Haruko: Dammit, I'm not running anymore!   
  
*Vespa miraculously drops out of the sky*  
  
Haruko: See ya later, brother! *smirks and speeds away on Vespa*  
  
*wasps chase after Haruko, who still doesn't realize that they are chasing her because of her Kool-Aid hair*  
  
Nao: The wasp woman, being chased by wasps. Go figure.  
  
Takkun: Na Na.  
  
Nao: Should I help her?  
  
Takkun: Na.  
  
Nao: Na? Your right. What has she done for me, other than given me splitting headaches? *points to Band-aid on forehead*  
  
Takkun: Na Na Na Na Na Na.  
  
Nao: Is that all you can say, you dumb cat? What are you doing, taunting me?!?  
  
Takkun: Na.  
  
Haruko: *realizes she's being followed by the bees, and jumps off the Vespa* *pulls out her bass*  
  
*moment of realization...brought to you by Kool-Aid*  
  
  
  
Haruko: LEAVE MY HAIR ALONE!!!!!!!!  
  
Haruko: *swings at the bees* *misses and falls on her booty*  
  
Author: Wow. Sounds like me in gym class.  
  
Nao: CAAAAAAAAAAAAANTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!  
  
*big robot thingy plops down from the sky*  
  
Nao: Why do all these things keep falling from the sky? Is the author too lazy to explain where they came from?  
  
Author: Bingo.  
  
Nao: Okay Canti, I'm ready. *gets ready to be eaten*  
  
*a mouse comes from...ummm...somewhere...and runs in front of Nao*  
  
Canti: *lunges at Nao with his mouth*  
  
Takkun: *jumps after the mouse and gets eaten by Canti*  
  
Nao: Great.  
  
*Canti turns black and grows cat ears and whiskers*  
  
Canti-kun: *rubs up against Nao's leg and purrs*  
  
Nao: *SIGH* Now what...  
  
*LIGHTBULB*  
  
Nao: I've got it!!! *grabs his cell phone; looks up a phone number in a phone book (no, I don't know where it came from...), and makes a phone call*  
  
Nao: Hello? *impersonates a blonde, bimbo-ish crazed fan-girl* OMG!!!!!!!! I can't believe I'm talking to you! I mean, you're famous! You're on commercials and drinks and stuff!! LYKE WOW! Could you maybe, lyke, come here and sign my head or another useless body part? REALLY?!? YAY!!!!!!! THANX!!!!!!!!!! *click*  
  
Nao: *stares at his watch*  
  
*five minutes later...*  
  
*giant red stretch limo with strangely familiar smiley faces on it pulls up*  
  
Mysterious Figure: Oh yeah, I'm here. Now where's that chick?!?  
  
Nao: I'm over here.  
  
MF: WHOA...unless I'm mistaken, which I hope I'm not, you are NO chick.  
  
Nao: *says in mocking voice* VEWWWIE GOOOD! Anyway, I need your help. See my friend over there? *points to Haruko, who is now wearing a hat...of bees* She is your biggest fan. She uses your product every day, hangs pin-ups of you above her bed, and has a shrine encircled with candles in her room, dedicated to you. Can you go over there and talk to her? It would make her so happy.  
  
MF (stands for mysterious figure, not mutha f#@ka, you sickos...): Well...I don't know...what with the bees and all...  
  
Nao: PWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZE???? *gets big watery chibi eyes*  
  
MF: Oh, alright...  
  
*MF runs over to Haruko, leaving a trail of red liquid behind him*  
  
Haruko: *smells fruitiness, pushes the bees out of her eyes, then waves to MF*  
  
Haruko: KOOL-AID MAN!!!! You're just in time!  
  
Haruko: *snickers*  
  
*cloud of bees above Haruko's head makes arrow sign, pointing to Kool-aid man*  
  
KAM: This is NOT kool.  
  
KAM: *runs through a brick wall; leaving giant Kool-aid man outline*  
  
Haruko: *pants, out of breath and stung several times* Thanks, brother...*pulls out bass and waves it threatingly* What the hell took you so long????????  
  
Nao: *points to Canti-kun, now using Haruko's bass as a scratching post*  
  
Haruko: Note to self: "Next time, dye hair with Jell-O"  
  
THE END *you can wake up now* 


End file.
